network } audio; un: panoptes

[sisterswitch]

Hey, everyone - Jack here. Or, I guess some of you might know me as “that evil lying bitch from Dualis who only cares about herself.”

[ahem, that’d be jane. not that jack’s still holding a grudge or anything.]

Anyway, the important thing here is that Navi asked me to pass on a message to the group, which is that they’ve picked up on a passenger who is in a great deal of distress but too far away to get a clear link of communication. In other words, one of our merry little band is missing and having an aggressively bad time way out in the woods.

So, consider this a roll call. Time is meaningless out here in the void, so nobody knows if it’s 10 o’clock, but do you know where your partner is? Who’s missing, and who wants to go rescue them from the big bad scary possibly haunted forest?

Comments

un: 64

[fuckregularpeople]

fuck you

who is it

[sisterswitch]

We don’t know. That’s why I’m talking to everyone. Try to keep up, sweetie.

[fuckregularpeople]

sorry i figured you'd know since watching people die is your favorite spectator sport

[sisterswitch]

Roller derby’s actually my favorite, but I guess at least you tried. I’ll have your participation trophy sent over in approximately six to eight weeks.

action: from the lurking weirdo

[albatrossomen]

Was that entirely necessary?

[There's maybe the slightest hint of reprimand in his tone at her poking the bear that is Jane, but only slightly. This is going to keep going if you two keep antagonizing each other.

He's just reading a newspaper he swiped in the corner, minding his own business. And decidedly not offering to contribute to the expedition to help.

It isn't his place to interfere with mortal affairs. This is their task.]

For the record my partner seems to be well enough.

[Knowing Emet-Selch he's probably having a nap somewhere.]

[sisterswitch]

[jack is stretched out on her back on her bed, fiddling with her device, but stops and turns her head toward murmur when he speaks up.]

Of course it was necessary. We have a certain policy on this ship - no child left behind.

[she knows full well that’s not what he’s talking about.]

Mine too, unfortunately. So that’s two sets down, at least.

[albatrossomen]

[He knows she knows, so he won't press the issue. Just raise an eyebrow and smirk at her, shaking his head slightly. Ah, you two.]

Must we?

[He really didn't want to get involved. But if Jack asked him to, he would.]

[sisterswitch]

Hey, she started it. I tried to help people and she’s done nothing but attack me for it since. I’m allowed to stand up for myself, aren’t I?

[yeah, that’s. not what you’re doing here, jack.]

[11calls]

This is so weird. I wonder if...

[Alex just frowns for a moment before she lifts up her hand and shows the glyph on it has returned to a blinking color.]

Could this mean that Martin is in trouble?

[sisterswitch]

[oh ... yeah, that's definitely not normal, except for when the partners are syncing up.]

Martin's your partner? Yeah, he might be the one in trouble. You can't connect to him, right?

[11calls]

No. It’s like there’s nothing there.

audio: snbellsareme

[relance]

[Julia is just going to sigh because of course some fucking idiot is going to go out there and like go looking for Slenderman and get lost. Honestly, she's kind of surprised that it's only a single person, but she imagines that's going to change soon enough.]

Shouldn't it be relatively fucking easy to figure this out? Anyone who doesn't respond to the post is probably the idiot who's gone missing. When you do, then let me know. I'll find him. I'm good at finding shit.

[Provided she can get a scent on them, but Jules isn't going to say that--she's not that much of an idiot.]

[sisterswitch]

[julia is ... not wrong, probably. jack's a city girl, and heading out into the woods without any kind of outdoor survival training is a classic "stupid white person in a horror film" move.

on the other hand ... she might get to meet slenderman.]

Aww, sweetie, you have so much faith in this group's ability to cooperate. It's adorable! You must not've been here when Navi asked everyone to help with surviving an emergency landing.

[jack is genuinely amused by this, not actively trying to insult julia.]

We also don't have a full list of everyone on board, so even if everyone else did respond, we still wouldn't know who's missing.

[relance]

How the fuck do we not have a complete list?! That’s dumb as shit.

[unnecessaryflourishes]

I would assume it to be any given time somewhere, if not necessarily here.

[sisterswitch]

[jack sighs loudly. she's gonna need to keep explaining this stuff all the time, isn't she.]

I was making a callback to an old PSA: "It's 10 o'clock, do you know where your children are?" It's pretty well-known, where I'm from.

[unnecessaryflourishes]

Not so where I happen to be from.

un: gr€€d

[betterhavemammoney]

Haha! What kind of idiot gets themselves lost in the woods? [Asks exactly the sort of idiot who would get himself lost in the woods.]

Wait, it's not Shaun is it?

[sisterswitch]

I don’t know. Who’s Shaun?

[betterhavemammoney]

You know, he's got hair and stuff, is about this tall? [He holds his hand up to approximately Shaun's height, thoughtlessly showing off the glyph on it.]

He's okay for a human. D'ya know where he is?

un: hailtotheking

[adaptiveimmunities]

I'm not lost. I know where I am.

[Narrator voice: He does not know where he is.]

[betterhavemammoney]

Yeah? Where are you?

audio

[felldownahole]

The what from where now?

[Okay, honestly he doesn't particularly care, a good, healthy amount of self-interest is perfectly normal and also life-saving. Also it's not the point. The point is, one of them is missing, he's....fairly certain? It's not his partner?? And honestly, anywhere is better than here, on this weirdly sterile box.]

Big bad scary possibly haunted forest sounds like home sweet home to me. And it's not as though I'm doing anything else round here, may as well play fetch.

[sisterswitch]

That's the spirit!

[finally, someone who's fully on board and not questioning her motives.]

Dualis is the name of the city where I was before. Some people there got the idea that I'm an evil lying bitch and only care about myself. You know, the standard assumption you make when someone offers something to help out.

[felldownahole]

A good, healthy amount of self-interest hasn't ever hurt anyone, far as I'm concerned, and as long as you fall closer to one on the 'one-to-sacrificing-babies' scale of evil, we're good.

[From anyone else, it'd sound glib. Hell, from Trevor it sounds glib, but he really does mean it. Long as Jack isn't one of the baby-yeeting-and/or-eating evil, he's fine with living and letting live.]

Anyway, we know which lucky lamb it is who's gotten himself lost in the woods?