Put your shame in a box // How could you be so wrong?

[albatrossomen]

Who: Lucifer and Murmur
What: The follow up to their earlier confrontation
Where: Observatory
Warnings: Celestials are giant children





Lucifer Morningstar. Here, on this sentient ship floating around in a vast unfamiliar universe. Unfallen, emotionally volatile and yet caring enough to not risk harming a mortal. To protect a mortal. Of all the timelines Murmur thought he might intersect one like this certainly didn't fall on his radar.

Perhaps he was losing his touch.

Of course, not completely. When the time came and he knew Lucifer was seeking him out he decided to make himself available. Preparing tea and having it fresh and ready for whenever the Devil himself managed to find him waiting and brooding in the Observatory. Nothing like the stars all around them to really set the mood for what was likely going to be a very uncomfortable conversation.

Murmur wasn't looking forward to it. This one should hopefully not end in coming to blows, at the very least.

Comments

[dealwiththe]

That outburst gets Lucifer to pause, and even smile faintly, though it's still not a happy smile.

"You mean your universe's version of Michael isn't a scheming, sniveling, slope-shouldered toerag with a persecution complex? It sounds better and better all the time."

He hasn't actually seen or heard from his twin in millennia, and only suspects he might be interfering with his humans, but he's still got the string of insults at the ready.

[albatrossomen]

That is absolutely not the kind of description Murmur would have ever expected to hear of Michael.

"...You don't happen to have more alcohol do you?" Because frankly he could use a bit with this revelation. "In my universe, Michael leads Heaven's armies. None can deny his martial prowess nor that he is typically honorable in his approach. However..."

No one's listening right? He's not going to get a sword through his gut for having the audacity to levy any criticisms at all? Murmur does look wary, as though he fully expects that speaking the words is enough to summon one of them down on his head. "He is still self-righteous, self-important, and quick to rip the wings from your back and cast you into Hell. So, it certainly isn't all sunshine and roses."

[dealwiththe]

Lucifer lets out a bark of laughter at that - particularly the mental image of Michael being any kind of leader.

"Most of my siblings couldn't lead themselves out of a paper bag, least of all Michael. No one ever liked him. His affinity is fear, you see. I'm, well, me. The epitome of desire. I draw them out of people, know all the best ways to fulfill them. All Michael has ever been able to do is terrify people."

He glances at his flask, gives it a little shake. "There has to be something decent available here, especially if I'm going to be here a while."

[albatrossomen]

Talk about weird. "It would seem our universes truly do have an abysmal sense of humor. It's as though the two of you swapped places, then developed a severe case of murderous psychopathy in my own." He knows angels and demons to be excessively stabby where he's from. This is quite refreshing.

"We may have to wait for a visit to another planet, the ship isn't kept stocked. Though Julia may have a stash at hand." She was pretty good at keeping herself well pickled.

[dealwiththe]

"Earth has always had the best liquor," he opines with a weary sigh.

"Several of my siblings are murderous psychopaths, they just don't care enough about humanity to bother." Thank someone for that. "Amenadiel got better, he's evolved from trying to send me back to Hell to - well, he'll probably be in the running for dad of the year soon. If he stops fretting about it for five minutes."

To be fair, any dad is better than Lucifer's Dad.

[albatrossomen]

"Oh I don't know, have you tried any of the other worlds?" So far everything he's encountered on this adventure has been much more potent. Whether or not that's better is up for debate.

"Ah well, at the very least yours seem a tad more tempered. Mine have grown... zealous as the eons of silence draw on. Does Father speak with yours?" Wait. What did he say? "What do you mean dad of the year?"

You guys can reproduce?

[dealwiththe]

"Oh, practically radio silent for millennia," Lucifer says dismissively. "Always has been that way, though."

Of course, he does know of at least one time in recent memory when his Father had issued a direct order to one of his siblings - less than 40 years ago, when Amenadiel had been tasked with blessing an infertile human couple - John and Penelope Decker.

But Chloe Decker's miraculous origin is one of the things that is proverbially stamped with an "OFF LIMITS" sign in Lucifer's mental filing cabinet.

Amenadiel's foray into parenthood, however, is not off-limits, and he chuckles. "My brother didn't bother to Google the pull-out method. Rookie mistake."

[albatrossomen]

"The more things change, the more they stay the same." Always has been, good to know at least the most infuriating part is consistent.

That would certainly strike as a strange, but not unheard of, event. Mysterious ways and all that.

Murmur pinches the bridge of his nose to quell the immediate alarm that followed at that news. "You can reproduce?" Excuse him he's having a minor existential crisis.

[dealwiththe]

Lucifer's shrug is eloquent. It speaks volumes of what he doesn't know. Remember how he just said his Father is practically radio silent?

"Amenadiel did. Of course, we self-actualize, so he possibly just self-actualized himself into child support payments for the next eighteen years."

[albatrossomen]

Okay, yes, but he expected they'd know a bit more about their own physiology to some extent wouldn't they... Apparently not.

"And no one is concerned about Nephilim?" Although, wait, no he's calm this is fine. It's probably fine! These are very different angels and they're probably fine. Lucifer sure doesn't seem concerned by it. Maybe they never had the Nephilim issue in the past? And with the self-actualizing that actually made a lot more sense. "We do as well to... a small degree. Well, as far as I know. This is a recent discovery. Most remain unaware."

[dealwiththe]

"Those are a myth, at least in my corner of the multiverse. Fun stories, though, you'd think if any of us was going to have a lot of little half-angel monster babies running about it'd be me, but I've never heard of it."

Lucifer basically invented the concept of sluttiness.

"Anyway, Charlie seemed normal enough to me. Barring any more kidnapping attempts by rogue demons - which I was going to stop by returning to Hell - I don't see what the big deal is. And we only just found out about the self-actualization as well. All those millennia, I thought it was just Dad messing me about. Still sort of was, I suppose, since He never bothered to tell us how it worked."

[albatrossomen]

"You're lucky they're just stories for you..." He muttered, more under his breath than anything. Phew, alright, well... No crisis there. Hopefully. Monstrous half-angels are an absolute nightmare.

It would be really bad in Lucifer's world.

A dismissive gesture. "Why would he? Mysterious ways, questioning forbidden, so and and so forth."

[dealwiththe]

"Might've saved a lot of pain and misunderstandings, but you're right. He'd never make it that simple," Lucifer says, bitter again. Yep, he invented daddy issues.

[albatrossomen]

Lucifer is the poster child for daddy issues. "Too easy. We can't be having that now can we?" Everything always had to be horribly complicated and stress-inducing. It's like suffering was built-in from the start. Maybe it was, though Murmur wasn't exactly up for philosophizing about the inevitability of suffering with Lucifer already stressing himself out.

"Well, that aside there's not much more we can do here but wait. Navi is en-route to some kind of machine that can allegedly return us to our homes but space travel never can be a snappy endeavor."

[dealwiththe]

"...Right." He hates sitting idle. Lucifer is just not the type, so this is going to be tough.

"So, Miss Lopez," he says, finally returning to his original point. "She's been a believer as long as I've known her. Even got me to go to church with her once," he adds, an amused, somewhat affectionate aside, before he shakes himself out of the nostalgia. "But she's only just learned the truth. As you saw. So. Tread carefully. Not for my sake, for hers. She's strong, but she doesn't deserve, well... any of this."

[albatrossomen]

Surely Lucifer will find ways to keep himself entertained and distracted in the interim. And since he isn't a threat to the mortals Murmur's not going to worry about it.

Ah, yes, the angry human who beat him with a shoe. "Something about the image of you attending a mortal church is highly amusing, did you critique the pastor the entire time?" Because he would have had a very hard time not telling them they're reading it wrong. There's a reason Murmur isn't invited to book clubs. Although, he gets the point and nods. "Very well, I will endeavor to not disillusion her excessively. Though I make no promises, humans are still somewhat... foreign to me." He likes them, they're just weird.

[dealwiththe]

"Oh, I found far more interesting things to do than debate the padre," Lucifer says, already going back down happy memory lane. "She was brunette, and had the loveliest legs." Well, not quite as nice as the Detective's, but nobody is quite as nice as the Detective. "Amazing how easy it is to find people in church who want nothing more than to desecrate the confessional booths."

Spoken with the air of a man who has desecrated, like, dozens of them over the years. What was he talking about again? Oh, right.

"She'll hug you. Almost certainly. Just let it happen, she does it to everyone," he adds with a shrug. "Miss Lopez is a force of nature."

[albatrossomen]

Oh. Oh. Right yes, that's a thing this Lucifer does apparently. No Nephilim. Murmur's really going to have to wrap his mind around that horror. "I'd say I was surprised but... that would be a lie." He might not spend a lot of time around humans but he's distinctly aware of how little they like to follow their own rules. It's a fun game they play.

"I don't know, I think we may have gotten off on the wrong foot. Er, shoe." But it's not like he'd really argue against a hug either. Humans are weird.

[dealwiththe]

Lucifer waves that off. "She's not just a believer. She's one of the good ones. She'll give you another chance. She believes in those. Forgiveness, acceptance - those aren't abstract concepts to Miss Lopez. No matter how little you think you deserve them."

He says that simply - a rote statement of fact.

[albatrossomen]

A bemused sound. "Truly? Interesting. I shall take your council under advisement." He's really not sure how to navigate around her faith and not being utterly disappointing but... he'll try. It is interesting that Lucifer mentions how little he might think he deserves it, but he's pretty sure this isn't an observation of Murmur. He's pretty good at keeping to himself.

"How has she adjusted to her revelation about you? Given that you're here, I'm guessing things went well enough?" In other words: Lucifer isn't still sulking about it.

[dealwiththe]

"She had as many surprises for me as I did for her," Lucifer says cryptically. Nope, he's not elaborating on that.

"The first time we met, she hugged me and told me the Devil gets a bad rap. She thought I was a method actor."

[albatrossomen]

"I think that I shall refrain from allowing my curiosity to traverse that offered thread, thank you." He'd prefer Lucifer didn't, this one sounds lewd he'd like to avoid that.

"Really? Interesting indeed, well then, perhaps I should stop avoiding my new partner and present myself for whatever I may be in for." He's expecting more shoes, to be honest.

[dealwiththe]

It wasn't actually a thread Lucifer was offering - he's happy Murmur shut it down. Hilariously, it's not lewd at all - nothing about his relationship with Ella is sexual in any way, she's like a sister to him. If it had been lewd, he'd've been happy to talk about it in detail, as a matter of fact. But it's about like, his feelings and future stuff that he's still trying to process, so, yeah. Nope. Not inclined to discuss in detail right now.

"She's one of the most remarkable humans I've ever met," Lucifer says of Ella now, with no prevarication. It's a rarefied list - Doctor Linda and the Detective are the only other two on it, with perhaps Trixie making an appearance as well. "She is worth your time."

[albatrossomen]

The one time Lucifer isn't being lewd and Murmur didn't even catch it. He'll learn to read him better with time, for now he's just glad they seem to be on better terms now. Truth was he could use some help in protecting the mortals on the ship, so if Lucifer had more incentive all the better. Feelings are hard, best just to ignore them in his opinion.

"A ringing endorsement, indeed. Of that I have no doubt. Now, if you'll excuse me. If you need me in the future you have but to ask."

[dealwiththe]

That doesn't seem to be sarcasm. Which is weird. Most people - certainly other celestials - are unlikely to take any endorsement from him to heart.

Huh. He'll need to think about that for a bit.

"Right. We'll have to hunt down some good liquor together," he says with a faint smirk.

[albatrossomen]

Definitely not sarcasm. Lucifer has proven himself a staunch ally and friend to mortals, so there was no reason to discredit his opinions on them out of hand. Ultimately he wasn't going to judge this Lucifer on the actions of the one from his own universe. That would be irrational.

"I look forward to it." But, with their conversation at a close he didn't remain long. In what's probably a fairly familiar scene for Lucifer a brief gust of wind is all that signals that Murmur's dispersed.